Tough Titties Nipple Rub

I needed a laugh today and randomly found it at this Etsy shop called Least Likely To Breed. (And by "randomly found" I actually mean "obsessively checking who has favorite'ed my shop and she did").

I'm not embarrassed to admit that I just might need to buy some of her Roid Rage, "The Classiest Flashiest Hemorrhoid Remedy on the Planet". There's no shame in that. And if you think there is, well you haven't given birth yet.

But my absolute favorite product is Mother Effers Va-J-J Jelly. "Too dry for a bone?" , she asks. Why yes, thank you ever so much.